Title: Saying Goodbye Without Saying Hello
Genre: Nonfiction/Christian/Grief & Loss
Formats: Paperback and Ebook
E-Cover By: RaeBeth McGee-Buda
Paperback Cover: Marcy Rachel
Editor: Lee Ryder
Date Published: October 15, 2013
The journey of pregnancy brings hope, joy, and love for the expecting mother. The hope of giving birth to a new life. The joy of feeling this new life grow inside of her. The love that starts with a test that doesn’t ever end. Dreams for the unborn child flood the new mother’s mind, as well as those around her. Each step of the pregnancy is a cherished moment. The anticipation of meeting her cherished baby builds from the very first month and ends after birth. This is the story of one mother and how a few words changed her life forever. How a piece of her faded when she heard these words: “There’s no heartbeat.” When RaeBeth Buda laid in the hospital in labor, she and her husband heard those dreaded words. What happens when all of those dreams are shattered in a moment’s notice? How does one cope with the loss of their child? This is the story of their journey and of the devastating grief of the loss of her daughter, Dakota Emily Buda.
Shortly after our perfectly imperfect wedding, my husband and I headed off to our honeymoon. We were thrilled. It seemed like things were finally falling into place. He had a great job and we were happy. The honeymoon was amazing. We decided to take a trip to the Pocono’s for the most amazing time at the most beautiful and entertaining resort we could find...Pocono Palace. I felt like a princess. We overly enjoyed our honeymoon. We took walks, played games in the game room, and made some memories would will last a lifetime.
Of course our honeymoon went by too quickly and after two weeks, we headed home. I was glad to though because I was missing my daughter. She’s an amazing little girl who has one heck of a sense of humor. She brightens our world. There’s not a day that goes by where she doesn’t make us laugh or make our hearts melt. Her personality is amazing and her outlook on the world is impressive.
Let me introduce to you our princess, Emma. She’s our world, our breath that we breathe, and we love her more than life itself. She’s a daddy’s girl and isn’t your typical little child. She loves to get down and dirty with her daddy when working on cars, but won’t hesitate to spend the day getting her nails painted with Mommy.
When we got back from our honeymoon, life went back to the way it was. Emma started first grade and Greg went back to work. I had a book I needed to finish writing. I tried so hard to finish this book but out of the blue, I started to get sick. My stomach would hurt and I was exhausted. Several weeks went by and I didn’t seem to be getting any better.
Then it came to me, I might be pregnant.
As a mother of two beautiful daughters I cannot imagine the pain of carrying your child for nine months only to be told that she is dead inside of you. RaeBeth's story is heart wrenching and the fact that she shares it with us shows the strength and determination this woman has. RaeBeth takes us through the happiness of her pregnancy, of getting ready to welcome Dakota into the world. Even knowing what will happen we are routing for her and her family. By the time she goes into labor I could not stop the tears cascading down my face. The pain she describes is the worst possible. What mother cannot relate to giving birth. Having to do it without the promise of looking into your baby's eyes at the end leaves you breathless.
I am so glad that RaeBeth has the support of not just her family but of her church as well. The circle of friends and family around her helps her draw the courage to go on. I am not a very religious person but reading about how her faith helped her was inspiring.
This is a book that every mother should read to realize how lucky we are. I wish RaeBeth and her family the best and hope that God blesses them and keeps them close.
About the Author:
RaeBeth McGee-Buda was born in southwestern Pennsylvania in 1987, the second daughter of Rachel Yost and Arthur Curtis McGee. RaeBeth grew up loving to read and write poetry, as well as short stories. Her childhood dream was to become a teacher. Rae Beth's dream of writing was created in her eleventh grade literature class where writing became her passion. RaeBeth married in August 2012 to her husband, Gregory Stephen Buda Jr. and resides in a small Pennsylvania town of Fairchance. RaeBeth is a full time mother of one beautiful little girl and a mother to an angel in heaven as of May 27th, 2013. She graduated from American Intercontinental University in 2010 with her associates in business administration. She enjoys spending her time writing and feels that connecting with readers is her main goal.